You know the type; they chronically complain about most anything and see everything through gray and depressing lenses. These individuals may have legitimate problems of course, but much of what they struggle with are minor issues that the rest of us do not put much energy into, if any. They may even see positive or neutral events in a negative light (e.g. “Sure, I won the lottery but look at all the taxes I have to pay”). They come and dump on anyone that will listen (that may be why they keep coming to you!) and temporarily feel better after unloading another pile of woe on to you. Of course, now you feel miserable.
Griffiths does not go into the how-to’s of setting these boundaries with negative folks, but warns us to be prepared for negative reactions. He encourages us to “stay resilient because the pay-off is big”.
If you have a complainer in your life and are ready to better deal with their negativity, Guy Winch, Ph.D has some survival tips to consider from this article on psychologytoday.com.
Even with expert tips on managing negative people, it can still be a challenge to put them into practice. If you find yourself with such a challenge, consider a telephonic, video or face-to-face counseling session with a VITAL WorkLife consultant. We are available to help any time, day or night. Members: contact us at 800.383.1908 or through the VITAL WorkLife App to get started today.